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Post by Samantha McCabe on Feb 22, 2014 5:20:16 GMT 10
I have copied and pasted a piece of writing I wrote, which is a bit sketchy, about my thoughts on the "Lost Woman".
Lost Woman
Woman is in a constant state of trying to remember what it is that she has lost, she feels it but cant put her finger on it, she just cant remember. What woman is trying to find and remember is that which was taken from her so long ago but the hidden wound remains within her, it is the stripping of her Divine gifts, her feelings, and her truth. Woman is empty and unfulfilled and is looking for fulfilment anywhere she can but it is always far outside of herself, in all the wrong people, places and situations. There is nowhere she has to go, nothing she has to buy and no one she has to be other than herself to find the Lost woman.
Through thousands of years man has robbed woman of her divine secrets and plotted to destroy the Goddess and all woman’s connection with Her truth, nature and healing. Man wanted control and the Church to be the only ones that could be divine and do any kind of healing, only the church and the Patriarch regime were the connection to the divine, the day of the Matriarch was over. No woman could practice her healing arts, her knowledge of nature and herbs was forbidden she was stripped of her truth, her power, her sacredness and a fear fell on all women leaving them in a state of denial and repression to any knowledge they had, it could mean certain death if they were found to be practicing any sort of natural gift. Woman was now left in a state of fear of all that was natural to her, scared to heal, scared to feel and scared even to be Woman. This fear stayed with woman through the ages and she being the giver of life passed this fear on to her children both male and female, woman must do the will of man, always be subservient and obedient to him and his wishes. I certainly saw this in my upbringing with my Grandparents and my parents but in its diluted form by which do as you are told, be obedient children, do the will of your parents forsaking your own wants and needs and so it went on, we grow up in denial of our truth and repressing all we feel to please another, we are who we are taught to be, totally controlled so giving society and governments an easy job of controlling us on a mass basis, yes, we have our parents to thank for teaching us that, and the governments must thank them for doing a great job on us for them.
Woman’s beauty and naturalness is in her divine gifts, her truth, her feelings, her intuition and it was all stripped away and replaced with fear, denial and repression through mans need of control and power and I believe this fear that ran through the veins of those brave suffering women then, still flows through the veins of woman today if they are part of our family lineage an inbred fear of being woman, a fear of being our truth and feeling. We have been taught through the ages that we are not worthy as equal beings to men even to the extent of being blamed for the fall of man, what chance did we have right from the off woman was evil.
Woman still does not feel at home with herself still looking for the acceptance of man for her to feel ok, she still does not feel equal or worthy although she thinks she has come so far she is still so unloving to herself and not being her truth, she cant be, as she has no idea what her truth is as that was taken by the programming of her parents that was taught to them flowing right down the unloving lineage, but its now not just women, it is the feminine aspect within both the sexes that has been denied and repressed, the denial and repression of feelings, our truth, the truth of both man and woman and it is within our feelings that we will find our common ground, our equality. Woman does not need to be competing with man or try to be like him, they are missing the point totally, we have no need to prove our worthiness, this just deepening our unworthiness, man is not our enemy and woman has to stop seeing herself as second rate, the battle of the Wills has to end and woman has to stop being so unloving to herself and begin to heal her deeply hidden wound of the ages, the denial of her truth, her feelings. Womankind could really teach and be the turning point to bring love back to this planet through doing her healing and teaching this to her children as the life giver of this planet it is woman’s job to make the change and teach her offspring both male and female about the balance we all can have as we all have this fear in common and that is the fear of feeling because of the truth that we might reveal about ourselves, you will be disturbed but then you will be truly amazed when you discover your truth. Womankind will then be Kind-woman and Mankind will then be Kind-man. It is time to heal the hidden wound that goes unrevealed within every woman but is passed on virally to every child by both parents, we now live with the fear and denial of expressing our truth in fear of getting told of or upsetting those that we need to love us and as a child, if you get told off it feels like the end of the world and that you are now unloved, so you do all you can to do as you are told at the expense of your own will and your own truth until your will and truth dissolve like they never even existed, much like yourself.
Being a woman and expressing our feminine aspect, which is in both men and women, is about living our true expression, fully being our truth by expressing our feelings and finding the truth of them, our true self which hides underneath all that we were taught to be, the impostor. We owe it to ourselves and the millions that have died for expressing their nurturing, healing and natural gifts over the ages and let them know that we are re-addressing the right to be our truth, repression and denial of ou truth has to be seen for the sin that it is and it is time to come out in our full glory and express what gifts we were given by God our Mother and Father, to be the truth of our feelings and show our sacredness and begin the journey, to lead the way of Womankind, teach both men and women and put an end to the sinful denial of who we are. Man taught us to look to the skies for God, Woman will teach to look within and be one with the divine fragment that waits for us, woman will awaken to the pain of their denied past and learn to be their true spiritual expression of truth and we will show man the way of healing through the truth of their feelings.
Added Info that came to me in the night.
Woman is already free and liberated there is no need to prove her worth or be competing with man, she can free herself from her denial but is locked in by her feelings which she keeps suppressed, this is the key, this is the very thing that is keeping her feeling the victim, she doesn’t feel worthy of being heard for fear of getting told off or in trouble like when she was a kid but this is the same for men too of course.
Women in the church
What are women thinking off !!! How could we accept the church of England “Voting” (men voting) on the acceptance of women in the church. The fact that we let that even happen is a disgrace. I say I am not up for letting anyone vote on my worthiness. Just by accepting that very act to happen is like saying, ok, you’re right we are not worthy we just need your vote to confirm that. It is a message to the world saying that it is mans opinion that dictates the worthiness of women, my god woman wake up. We have forgotten that Man stole this from us, he took all of our divine knowledge and used it against us for power and control that is still as strong today, woman has had to claw her way to any level because of this atrocity. Woman is now waiting for man to vote us back into society and for man to announce to the world that they have decided woman is now ok to be let loose with society, we are trying to prove ourselves to man , to be accepted by man, only then will we be ok and feel accepted, when man says we are. I say to woman- kind, stop this now, stop waiting for the approval of man, dad, father and look to yourself, accept yourself, love yourself if we do not begin to wake up to this we are saying that what has happened to the women in the past was ok, it doesn’t matter, that was then. It does matter and the balance needs to be addressed. The church feels threatened by woman and her natural gifts, it always has, they labelled them witches and murdered them so they could have power and control and if woman gets the vote in the church today then slowly questions will be asked by women about the truth and the church will crumble. What answers will the church have for us, I wonder if it will be, “ Well, we wanted all the knowledge the wise women had and the secrets of their divine connection to god and nature so we took them and tortured them for their knowledge then we killed them so there was no trace. I am sorry but we cant have them back in because that would mean we might have to apologise to them and say we were wrong and they were right, but looking back on it now we wish we had just all worked together and learnt from each other in a balanced way to teach both man and woman contain the fragment of god not just men of the church.” Mmmm.
Through the ages Woman has been denied and suppressed of all feeling expression by Man and his need for power and control. Woman was stripped of her feminine aspect of truth through her feelings as she was no longer to express her truth and natural gifts. Woman now lived in fear of being woman so stayed subservient to man living his will not her own. Woman now being the child bearer and giver of life teaches her children this, to be good, do as you are told, honour your father and Mother, be Obedient, seen but not heard etc, Child both male and female grow up and then teach their own children this, to never be yourself but be what you are told to be so never knowing your truth, never knowing your self, never knowing your feelings and if you do, never express them, deny, suppress and learn to be so unloving to yourself but always do the will of others, Deny yourself at all costs.
We women have a lot of work to do ………….`
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Post by Samantha McCabe on Feb 22, 2014 18:26:12 GMT 10
This is something I wrote two years ago to express my feelings about the Church voting Women out, some of it might sound a bit GGrrrrr but I felt like that. I am not saying woman should take over, but that we are equal, it might take woman to lead the new way until men get over the shock and we work together, it will take a long time but it has to begin.
MEN VOTE WOMEN OUT
It was not a huge surprise to me that the vote for Women Bishops got voted out by the general Synod of the Church of England, but sad none the less. I was listening to the comments and just knowing the truth was being veiled and supressed as it has been for so long(The age old lie, that woman cannot be divine). There is a certain fear brewing from the male dominated form of Christianity that the truth will be uncovered and the breakdown of the church, they know that the promise of salvation cannot be kept by leading us to believe in the male dominated outer doctrine. Christianity can only keep its promise when the Feminine is restored, the Divine Feminine, the balance and equality and Truth that is missing in the church and its people. I am not talking about an overpowering of female roles in the church but a new respect where male and female are equal and rise above gender, no separation. The Church is so stuck in the male dominated mind-set and recognizing the feminine would shake up so many and their beliefs would be challenged and questioned, as they should be because is it now time to begin the enquiry and do Christians not wonder to themselves why the abundance promised does not seem to materialise, I know a lot of Church goers and I hear about there lack more than their gain. My own mother is a weekly church goer and I asked her if she felt close to God and she told me she felt like God was unreachable and so far from her, which she would feel as that is what is taught in church and the Pastor is the only one with a divine connection. In my Mothers church, Evangleist, they do not believe woman can lead people to God only Man and she gets so frustrated because she wanted to do more but was blocked in every direction by the Male clergy and even some of the women. I feel a sense of fear within them, fear to question the church as questioning would bring about change and just maybe the truth be uncovered, look at what happened to Jesus when he wanted to bring his message of Truth, not Religion, Truth. Unless Women are acknowledged for being equal to men and can’t hold any position, there will never be balance within the church and as shown by this vote, equality is still a way off and the church has shown it is still not willing to see Women as equal, so how can there be any growth within the church and its people. I feel new movements need to spring up and the rigid doctrine and structure of the church left behind if they are not willing to transend in truth, if they don't grow then what message is that giving out to its people, Woman is still not seen as divinely equal and none growth is good?? we were put here to be more. It is time for people to try something new and fresh that teaches Truth, Growth, Love, Nurturing and the power of Self, the God within, Equality and giving people the truth about who they are. But are Christians ready for this change, how can we ever be more if we stay believing in an outer doctrine that doesn't teach Truth, growth, equality and love but teaches lies and separation. The Divine Feminine within the church would offer that change, to show us as being equals and understanding we were not to blame for the fall of man, to restore equality and balance, we as woman have to make a stand and say if we're not accepted we will have to come away from the unmovable structure of the church and find a new way to be a living example of Christs message of Truth and to unify the Divine Feminine and the Divine Masculine. We now have to recognize the Divine Feminine, understand the gift she brings, understand that without her balance and partnership Truth stops, growth stops, nurturing stops, Love stops, To be More stops, her balance will never restrict but be so beautiful and harmonious, not being opposite but complimentary, it sounds so wonderful and it could be like that, to unify people and help them grow and transcend in Love. It is only when men and women are balanced in there divinity can we be our truth. For Womankind to be ressurected we have to stop being passive and accepting the rigid male dominated structure of the church. I feel it is time to let that old identity die so that we can understand the real truth of the Christ Message. To overcome separation time is well overdue to know we are all equal and all sons and daughters of God. See that the old ways no longer work and this vote has proved it, women are still not seen as equal, still blamed for the fall, so the divine feminine is still denied raising the male aspect to the higher status which surpresses women's Truth, spiritually and physically, a great message hey. It is so overdue for a realization to rise above gender roles, rise above human sexuality of the male and female body so we can see ourselves in union with the Mother-Father God, Feminine - Masculine, you will realise there is no separation as god is infinite and their fragment is within everything including us. So to finish, I am saying that the church today is still deliberatly stopping women growing, denying the feminine truth and the importance of the Divine Feminine, how unloving is a religion that shows the woman that she will be allowed to do the flowers and make the teas after service and women that attend church, like my Mother, accept this by going, they are the very ones that are condoning the continued demise of the feminine when we should be offering our truth and assisting the growth of healing to the world, WOMAN BREAK AWAY, create and correct the balance and man will begin to follow. Create a new way, we are ready for new. Woman is ready for her Ressurection and to speak her truth.
By Samantha Hills 2012.
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Post by James on Feb 22, 2014 19:47:44 GMT 10
I loved all you wrote Samantha, very profound. I’d like to hear what Germaine Greer might think about it. This part particularly struck me “Man taught us to look to the skies for God, Woman will teach to look within and be one with the divine fragment that waits for us, woman will awaken to the pain of their denied past and learn to be their true spiritual expression of truth and we will show man the way of healing through the truth of their feelings.” Were we to get another The Urantia Book delivered to us, one that would be able to freely speak about the denial of the feminine, it surely would contain such a quote. But then again, why would we need such a book when you’re right here in person saying such things! I am very impressed, it’s so true, I love it, for I’ve seen it in my relationship with Marion. She is the well-spring of truth all coming up through her feelings. Without her I’d not have been able to make any headway, I’d have not have known where to start, still with my head in the clouds praying to God Himself to instantly and miraculously heal me. But Marion showed me that was never going to happen, and that I had to look to myself - my feelings, my feminine for my truth. And having done so, and having grown in truth, I know it’s true, and the right way for me to go - for us all to go. And as you say, it is the way to eventually unite with our indwelling spirit, because unless we’re healed, we can’t fuse with it, it’s not going to fuse with imperfection - sin, error and evil. So many people believe one can achieve the inner at-oneness with God through their mind because the indwelling spirit resides in our higher mind, but without engaging and living true to ones feelings, forget it, it can’t happen. And I love how you say the divine fragment is waiting for us, for us to do our healing, to become true to ourselves, to end our evilness. And we have to do it ourselves, decide we no longer want to be living against ourselves, not just waiting around for God to wave His magic wand and instantly all our pain and suffering is swept aside. Yes, I have for so longed wished I could read such things, all that helps me progress in my growth and understanding - thank you - Woman!
I’ve just read your second post. “Woman is ready for her Resurrection and to speak her truth.” Gee I wish somehow you could put the call out and women would take it up. Great article! And as you said, ironically it’s the very women that support the church that keep it going. I’m sure if the women didn’t do their little bit - attend, the whole thing would fade away because the men would all be left looking stupidly at each other endlessly quoting scripture.
You’ve inspired me to write some more about the Female Evil Ones, which I’ll post in the board to do with Technical stuff.
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Post by Samantha McCabe on Apr 12, 2014 20:20:41 GMT 10
I found this poem I must have wrote it years ago but I cant remember. Its a celebration of how bad I felt at that time. And it must have been pretty bad as most of my time has been. When I read it I felt the unanswered pain that I have always felt and the complete loneliness of being in pain and having no one to give you the answers, not even your parents, they have no clue as to what you are going through and don't even really want to know because it will mean they will have to look at the part they played in their child feeling this way. Your parents just take you of to the doctors and pass the responsibility on and get you a pill to take, so loving of them to show you how to cover it all up because they don't want to know.
The Great Fall (The Beginning)
How do I love myself! In sickness and in Health, in Poverty and Wealth How do I love myself! When things are just to tough, I feel I'm not enough How do I love myself! How do I Love myself! I hear it all the time, things will be just fine I'm not so sure they will, take another pill I'm screaming to my ceiling, asking God for healing I'm running out of chances, not hearing any answers I don't know where to turn, God has let me burn I do not love myself, so much to unlearn I feel to much pain, the Ego mind insane Such a hold on me, never to be free How do I love myself when nothing here is Love The furthest place away from love I am today My vocation is with Hell I got to know it well A void my soul has mastered A place I have to dwell I know its hidden corners I know its sickening smell The more I fought it screaming the deeper down I fell So how do I love myself this my journey given Someone out there help me, to madness I've been driven Doctors, Guru's, Masters can you tell me please How do I love myself I'm begging on my knees.
By Samantha Jane Hills.
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Post by James on Apr 12, 2014 20:50:27 GMT 10
A sad and lovely poem Samantha Jane Hills.
It sounds like you've been asking for a long time. I hope you do receive all the answers. I hope you do find all the love you are looking for.
'...they have no clue as to what you are going through and don't even really want to know because it will mean they will have to look at the part they played in their child feeling this way.'
It just makes me want to cry, I can't bear it: that they put you through so much shit, without having a clue that they are, and because they don't want to face the pain they've cause you, only serves to show you that you're right in how unloved you feel by them.
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Post by samantha9 on Jul 9, 2014 18:11:39 GMT 10
I am celebrating myself fully and the truths I have learnt from my soul. I have worked so hard for so long in so much darkness that I am finally feeling the amazing release by feeling the pain to its fullest that has been stored within me for so long. I am releasing the pain and I am celebrating the truth fully no matter how horrific a journey it has been in revealing it, I am never alone, My true Mother and Father want this for me and are always there for me when I ask. My soul is showing me the way of trusting in its dominance, I am truly rejoicing in my discovery of truth, I feel so new and so fresh. I am celebrating this incredible feeling while it lasts, until more pain comes for me to feel and reveal the truth of it, I now feel an excitement when the pain comes because I know I have been given more to heal from within my soul, to be rid of, for me to become my true self, I am so excited about getting to know me, the true me, I want to meet ME, the me I was so afraid of for so long and for most of that time I never knew the true me even existed. I am so comforted with having my true parents guiding me through this and the other day I had a overwhelming feeling that it has been like I have been adopted all my life by my physical parents that never told me about my true parents, keeping them from me, from ever knowing my true parentage. I am now feeling so much more complete and having a deeper relationship with them, feeling that I am their child and them giving me what I need to be with them fully one day. I am making the most of this feeling whilst it lasts and truly feeling Mary's spirit of truth comforting me through my intent and desire to always reveal more of myself, Mary, my sister of truth. I am sharing my joy at this time because it is so cherished and rare.
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Post by James on Jul 9, 2014 19:19:12 GMT 10
Keep going my dear, I am with you. We are right with you in your celebration, we feel your elation and celebrate it with you. All my love to you Samantha - Mary M.
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Post by desire2bme on Jul 10, 2014 8:35:11 GMT 10
Thanks Sam for your words here..."I want to meet ME"....I ditto that!
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Post by samantha9 on Jul 10, 2014 9:03:24 GMT 10
Thank you Desire. I have felt elated over the last few days and felt My Parents love flow through me with ease. It has been so welcome and I have felt so empty because of the non stop healing over the past few weeks, I feel truly emptied out and it was then I felt the inflow of love. There is always more though, so I go on. xx
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Post by samantha9 on Jul 11, 2014 6:25:45 GMT 10
Thank you Mary and James. Mary, your words of support strengthen me constantly, I have now opened my Granary and have spent the day talking to some incredible women who have and are truly suffering in their life experience and I have found myself speaking so naturally to them about my experience of healing through my feelings and they have understood and want to know so much more. I felt the shift in every one of them like a lightbulb being switched on within them and the feeling I received filled me with so much joy and Love, they felt it to. I never thought I would be able to speak in the way I have been with anyone but it just flowed so naturally and all the time keeping in mind my True Mother and Father are with me. I feel truly Elated at being able to use my own experience to help others, all through my feelings. Your spirits of truth are with me Mary and Jesus and with all of my heart I thank you both for helping me to reveal the truth within me. x
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Post by James on Jul 11, 2014 16:58:54 GMT 10
Sam, what are you doing in your Granary? And, would it please be possible for you to write about a specific experience with one of these women - the part of your conversation with them that affected them? And what is the new part you find yourself saying, the new words? Why I’m asking is because I feel Mary wants to say some more things to you, the feeling has been brewing for the past couple of weeks, but I want to read an example of what you’re saying to these women first - sort of get more of a feeling for it. What Mary wants to say is somehow tied up in what you’re doing in the interactions with people. And all good feelings from Mary, nothing bad - that’s probably my worry I’m putting on it.
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Post by samantha9 on Jul 14, 2014 3:34:30 GMT 10
Hi James
The Granary is a place for me to sell the things that I make and also I sell natural products from around the world like Frankincense Resin from Dhofar, Oman, Perfumes from Galilee, all natural exotic product that you cant find so easily over here. I have a reading room which is being put together at the moment and It will be a place for people to come and read the Urantia Book and the Padgett messages as well as other books and information or even just to talk together as I have found people doing naturally when they come in, They are still there 40 minute later. I am so delighted with the response so far as I said in my earlier post, women have been very happy to come in and have a look around and stay for a while to share their experiences in life. I had a lady called Liz come in and she had a walking stick, she is 35 years old and been through so much having been evicted and having to get rid of her beloved cats, then suffering a stroke at such a young age, then to find she had a tumor on her heart so had to have it removed with the scar right up her chest, and then suffered another stroke. She is now recovering but the doctors have said there is nothing more they can do for her with her state of mind so they have past her on to a psychiatrist because of her depression which she has had all her life. She felt so at the end of her rope being told there is nothing more they can do for her medically, she said to me she feels there is no hope for her. I asked her if she was willing to look at her suffering in a new way, a way that would give her new hope. To understand her suffering to be an incredible communication from all of her denied feelings and repressed pain since childhood manifesting themselves the only way they can, as illness. I explained to her that when we supress one part of our soul, when even one of our feelings is denied it affects our whole life, our whole body feels pain when we shut down our soul and say to ourselves they are not worth paying attention to, and we do this because we felt in our forming years that we were not worth listening to because we were ignored and denied so many times as a child and it is so unloving to ourselves to turn our backs on our feelings like we don't matter, as our parents did. She didn't say a word while I was talking and I could only talk to her about what has already entered my soul through my own healing Feeling experience but she was very receptive of what I was saying. She began to tell me that she was always denied as a child and has always denied herself everything, never allowing herself to truly enjoy life but to accept pain as being her journey in life. I could feel in her that when she said this she begun to get it, that because she was denied as a child she now denies herself, I could actually feel this truth being accepted by her soul, it was an incredible feeling that went through me and she felt it to. I explained to her that from a very early age, through her parents control she would have been taught to accept pain and suffering and not feel pleasure was hers to enjoy. She began to get very tearful and was embarrassed at her emotion, I told her to cry if she felt like crying, to express her pain and not to repress it adding more layers on top of the mountain of injury she had within her. I continued to explain to her that within her she carried so much unaccepted, un-expressed feelings that her body had no choice but to begin to shut down with the amount of denial resulting in a stroke which left her paralyzed, showing to her how the fear she has repressed made her feel paralyzed, to scared to move or experience anything. THen her heart shut down through her denial of love, never having felt loved and denying her feelings in such an unloving way her heart had broken. She said she has always felt alone, always felt sad, always been depressed and never really experienced Joy. I continued to explain that our natural state is to experience our passions and desires, that is what the soul wants for us but we deny all this living so out of harmony with love that there can only be pain and suffering left when we fight against ourselves every minute of every day, never fulfilling our wants and needs but doing the will of every one else way above our own wants and needs and I asked her if she could see how unloving this is to ourselves, she understood and in that moment she got it, I knew she had because I felt it from her, the very same feeling that I get when a truth has entered my soul. She began to cry but with relief that she was understanding that there is hope for her. When she walked in she felt hopeless when she left she was full of new hope that she could begin to help herself. I asked her to begin to take notice of her feelings instead of pushing them away, to accept them and to understand that by denying them and supressing the pain she will never feel any change within herself only pain, if she chooses to supress the pain the underlying cause will never be released but add to her illness. I really begun to feel a total trust in me when we were speaking, a rush of love between us that moved me to tears of joy for her, because she understood what I was trying to help her understand. I felt the emotional openness with her to receive what I was saying, there was no resistance it all flowed naturally, I have noticed through talking with people, when they are emotionally open to what I have to say, I can now feel it from them as I can feel when the come in and are shut down, it helps so much to be able to feel this now. I carried on with Liz explaining that pain and suffering are all a result of our repression of our feelings and that denying our feelings will only result in greater pain and the body wont function when you shut down the soul and to be aware of the events brought to you so you can awaken to your suppressed feelings that need to be released. I explained how to begin healing her feelings through acceptance, expression and finding the truth of her feelings, we talked about this and how allowing the expression of your feelings can begin your journey to healing. So much more was said but I cant remember a lot of it as it was just flowing so naturally between us because of her receptivity to what I was saying, she felt the truth in it and I know she went out the door thinking, What just happened, because I was too, I was full of so much energy I couldn't get any higher, I felt so clear, empty and good. I have never been a very good talker and feared ever speaking my truth to anyone but through the Granary I am meeting the right people that are helping me see so much more about myself and I am still writing all my feelings down during the day and healing and getting to the underlying cause much quicker. I don't really feel I have done my experience with Liz justice because the feelings that flowed between us were beyond words, so much love and I understood things about myself whilst we were talking, revealing so much more as I was speaking to her we both got so much out of it, it helped me to progress more with how I felt about helping people if they should ask and my feelings of guilt with helping others and the guilt of speaking my truth, feelings of unworthiness and so on, I have had to express all of it the feelings that I should not be helping anyone as I am not capable, If I need help I go to my parents and they will tell me what to do, not for me to know what to do without consulting them first, I will get told of. It goes on constantly but I am getting to the cause quicker now and feeling the incredible feeling when I release pain. I feel the more I am interacting with people the more natural I am being at speaking my truth.
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Post by samantha9 on Jul 14, 2014 7:45:11 GMT 10
I carve these wings out of wood for people, white ones and Black/Bronze, they are three feet tall and I write a message with them for the owners to explain how our wings are taken from us as children. I love the dark wings I feel they express the journey of repression and darkness and that we gain our wings by healing the darkness within us. They mean so much to me and the oppression I lived under throughout my growing years. Every thing I create is an expression of my journey and people have been so interested to read the messages, it starts conversations between everyone in the shop, revealing feelings within them and a thought to go home with. I am using my experiences to connect others through my Art expression and they can ask me questions if they feel they want to know more. Even if they express they don't like them it is an opportunity for them to look at why they feel they don't like them and I am sure Black Angel Wings will spark some dislike and I will explain the amazing gift the dark can bring when we feel brave enough to look into the darkness and stop denying it. Most people are buying the white wings not even looking at the black ones, or rather denying they are there, they are skipping right to the white ones which tells me so much about them and their avoidance of their dark feelings. The Granary is Black to which I love as it is where the truth of your healing is to be found, in your bad feelings.
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Post by James on Jul 14, 2014 9:53:41 GMT 10
That all sounds so good Sam, it sure sounds like a lovely place and such loving things you said and felt with Liz. And I love the wings and Marion would agree with you about the black, she only wanting to be in black herself, it being more true to how she’s always felt about herself. For as you say, it’s into our darkness we need to go to find out true light, all because our light was all but extinguished by our parents.
Thank you for writing about your experience with Liz and the Granary.
(I wrote this yesterday before your post about Liz and the Granary.)
Mary: Samantha my dear, yes I do want to give you further words of encouragement. You see certain things are going to happen to you that will help to focus you as a ‘Centre of Light’, to which, like moths to light, will come many people in need. And their needs will be to hear the truth you are to pass onto them, such as you intimated to James is already happening. And this will only happen more. And certain people will want to become involved with the work you will start doing, and they will help you and look to you, and you have nothing to fear because you’re more than able to attend to their needs. You will not be given a great burden to bear, you will however struggle at times to fit everything in along with all the work you will keep doing on yourself, but part of your doing such work will be a necessary example with which you’ll be able to use to allow others to see just what it is they will be able to achieve as they start to venture into their healing.
You see Samantha, for the likes of you and Desire one might say your healing comes rather naturally, for it does, but this will not be so for most others. Most other people will need a lot of hand-holding through example, so they can begin to take the necessary steps into their feeling acceptance, and certain people will need to be the Centres of Light and Truth to help such people. And in time there will be other such people, however One Bright Star will shine very bright in your part of the world Samantha. But not all people doing their healing will want to help others, for there will need to be those people doing the work on themselves so as to bring to light the full understanding of all that’s involved in the healing process, with such people having little time to give much hands on help to others.
And please understand Samantha that this undertaking is what your soul is all about, so you have nothing to fear, nothing will be too great for you to deal with. And you will always have myself and Jesus supporting you through James and more directly through your attending Celestial band, and then very directly through our Spirits of Truth.
James has just asked me, why don’t Jesus and I come and assist you in person, and the reason is because as we’ve told him, our personal and direct time like that with humanity has ended. We are now only providing such support directly through our Spirits of Truth but only when they are fully aligned with the Avonals Spirits of Truth, which all those who embrace the principles outlined by Divine Love Spirituality as they look to uncover the truth of themselves through their feelings will be doing. Other’s in spirit are taking over our role now, however as some people will be still heavily focused on us and our Spirits of Truth, so we’ll still be supportive of them through this time.
The world is going to move into very trying and difficult times. There will be a lot of upheaval in specific parts of it. However for you Samantha, and I also want to tell all who will be embracing their healing, such times will only provide yet more bad feelings to be acknowledged and worked through, so will in fact be of help to those doing their healing. Things may happen that put more pressure on you forcing you deeper into yourself, but this is to be expected, and you Samantha are working at an accelerated rate because there is and will be a lot for you to achieve personally in your healing and in your other work in a short time; but still, all so long as you keep adhering to your feelings, which you will do now, that quickness of time will be easily within your reach and will not overtax you.
And please bear in mind, we are more than willing to offer our support to you through James, so at any time please do not hesitate to call upon him. And should you want to make it all private and not do it through the forum you should do so, always doing what you feel, that applying to you all. And you might also like to consider making more private personal and direct contact with each other rather than through the forum should you feel to, because you will all be able to support each other as you work through your healing. However, as I stress, only should your feelings move you that way.
And this is all I wanted to say for now, to reiterate that your feelings will lead you in all that you do, and all you need do is stay true to them. And this means just keep acknowledging them and longing for their truth. There is nothing else that is required by or asked of you. And through your feelings your Mother and Father will guide your soul, and many wonders await you all.
All my love and blessing to you Samantha and to you too Desire and Wesley. You are all in Jesus’ and my heart, we are very fond of the three of you because of all you are doing with yourselves. Our love and truth goes out to you. Mary M.
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Post by samantha9 on Jul 17, 2014 3:30:41 GMT 10
Such encouraging and comforting words Mary, they mean so much to me, thank you and thank you James. James, would you or Mary please help me with some information about Angels please. I am having very vivid dreams about them and the word is every where I go at the moment. I nearly fell over a little girl in the shop and her name was Angel, my 81 year old customer who I met yesterday and stayed for over an hour, as she left she turned around and told me her name is Angel with an A, Angela. So much more to so I would like to understand more about them in a simple way because the Urantia Book was good but a bit of a hard read for me when I was trying to find out more about how they are around us and guide us. Do we have a pair from birth assigned to us? Thank you James, I know this is a huge subject and I am going over what the Urantia book says and as I grow I am understanding it more but in what way do they help us? I feel a pull within me to find out more at this time and so many people are coming into the shop telling me of their beliefs in the Angels. I do know that when Harry died, when he said to me he was going down the cliff path a bit more I went to follow him but felt myself being turned around and pushed back up the path to safety, I have always felt it was Angelic guidance looking after me on that day, I felt a presence with me and felt an incredible peace come over me for a brief time as soon as I saw him at the bottom of the cliff and I knew he had died, the feeling of stillness and peace was an incredible experience and my daughter felt it too and she said the Angels are coming. It has been the most unbelievable journey of loss as Mary may have felt when she lost Jesus, the pinnacle of the accumulation of all the grief we have ever had to feel and a time for accepting, expressing and finding the truth of ourselves within the experience of grief, the greatest of healing emotions, no matter what the experience we all feel loss and grief at the denial of our true self, we mourn as we live, giving up our true selves, I can remember feeling that pointlessness as a Child, "what's the point in my life when I am not allowed to live it", so I experienced Anger and grief all of which came up within me at the pinnacle of my grief when harry died, the experience brought it all into my awareness for healing and I thank Harry beyond words for letting me experience all of my grief and all of the other feelings that his death has allowed me to accept, express and find the truth of, I feel so much love in the whole experience of his passing, his death has made me feel the truth of my evilness, how unloving I have been to myself by denying my Grief and anger since childhood. Thank you James for all of your help.
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Post by James on Jul 17, 2014 15:40:33 GMT 10
Yes, we are assigned a pair of angels from birth - even from before our conception. They are as the nature spirits are only ‘bigger’. As to what they might look like so we can relate to them, they can present themselves, as can the nature spirits, in any acceptable or even unacceptable form they want. So they can appear as men and women, animals, angels - as in how we conceive them to be, scary monsters, anything really so I understand. And they don’t have wings as such, but can appear to have them if that’s how we want or need to see them. The ones that take us ‘across the thresholds’ of death, that being when we die in the physical and when we transition between mansion worlds, have what The Urantia Book calls friction shields which they use as they ‘wrap themselves about us’ to carry us into the next world, these shields being mistaken for wings. They’ve told me they are really just light, and I’ve tried to image them like that, so I see columns of light, all different beautiful lights swirling around, but mostly from what I understand they ‘put on a form’ so we spirits (including people, we being truth-seeking spirits) can see and so more easily relate to them. Angels like the nature spirits are creations of Mind, so are unlike us in that we’re creations of the Truth - if I can put it like that. They, being of the mind, exist in service to those of the truth, yet also have their own existence as in their own ascension of mind as we have an ascension of truth, they needing us in the work they do for us, to help them advance in mind, as we need their help to advance us in truth. As to how our angelic guardians actually help us, well I’ve asked them that numerous times, but still I’ve not as yet got what I feel to be a satisfactory answer. I understand that they are constantly attentive to the needs of our soul, and work in direct liaison with our Indwelling Spirits, they are always ‘tinkering’ in our aura, adjusting our light to help us with the experiences our soul requires: either going further into our darkness of truth denial or out into the light of truth as we heal ourselves, but I can’t be more specific than that as to what does that actual tinkering involve. I’ve had many experiences through my healing where suddenly and seemingly for no apparent reason I will get a pain in say my chest, like a line of muscles suddenly knot and I can hardly move when I try to get up off the couch. And this muscle knot lasts for a few days, week, sometimes months or years, putting some kind of inner traction upon my physical and emotional system, all helping me to go through what I need at the time. The Mother and Father always just call it more ‘adjustments’, and so I see it that the angels have inserted a light into my auric system that causes my muscles to knot, and the light stays there as long is needed, until my body and emotional and mental systems have readjusted themselves as I’ve worked through more yuk - always working presumably to some sort of perfection. Then there are times when they directly say things to my mind - to me - although I don’t hear them as a separate voice to me. Other people can, but also I think more often than not such inner or outside voices come from the mind spirits, and not God or the angels or Jesus as many would like to believe and do believe they come from. And it might be a thought, inspiration, that sort of thing, but I also get that all time from my Indwelling Spirit, Mary and Jesus, the Mother and Father as well as Celestials, and mostly I can’t distinguish who’s who, so I don’t I care who is saying what, and really for all I know, it might all be just my own mind anyway. The other side to angels being with us is the fascination of their ‘Working for God’ so being ‘messengers’ and ‘instruments’ of our Mother and Father - and what does this mean? Certainly they have been called upon from time to time to inspire mortals, to give prophecy, to engage with us in our minds through thoughts, visions, dreams and direct speech we can hear, and also they have been called upon to work wonders, anything from moving you Samantha out of harms way as you said, to physically lifting someone up off the ground and out of the way of impending danger, such as being hit by a car; also as seen by the example of Jesus’ life (which is a great part of Jesus’ story in part four of The Uranita Book, the supernatural workings of what went on behind the scenes in spirit), affecting incredible healing miracles. The Mother and Father together with my angelic pair have told me they can do absolutely anything so far as manipulating or changing anything on the physical, including in our aura, so in our minds and emotional systems and so on. So they make things disappear, or appear, they can heal any part of us on all levels, they can do whatever we imagine they can do and more; they could even heal the whole world in the blinking of an eye should it be what the Mother and Father want. So they have astounding ‘powers’ of which we have no idea, being able to shift mountains around, part the seas, all that sort of ‘Biblical stuff’. And they can do it irrespective of us, or with us, as in we being the vehicle or instrument they work through. But what they won’t do, unless they have ‘fallen’ - have rebelled, of which they did at the time of the Lucifer Rebellion, but since have all been ‘reclaimed’ - redeemed, is do such things upon their own will - just doing them for themselves. Their pleasure is derived in serving us, our soul and so God, doing all that is asked of them. We each have a pair of angels overseeing and ‘guiding’ us, however as you’ll read in The Urantia Book, depending on the mind and truth advancement of the person under their care, they might look after up to 1000 people at once, such people having very little need for more direct involvement with their angels. And such people are mostly people who are content to stay within their evilness, plodding along believing all there is is in the material realm, content to have their careers and so on without any thought of wanting to grow in truth or wanting to understand ‘what’s it all about’. But as people progress in truth and mind then the angels ‘come closer to them’, until as with anyone wanting to do their healing and taking the steps of becoming true, then the angelic pair (they always work in pairs - being examples in that for us to follow, as in with our soulmates) is assigned to look after that one person. So Sam, you will have ‘your’ pair of guiding angels with you constantly, in every breath you breathe and every thought you think and in every feeling you feel. They will often be both ‘on station’ with you, but do rest and have time for themselves (one at a time) to integrate all the light they are growing in. As an angelic pair, they are a ‘female’ and ‘male’ angel, that is how they might and most often present themselves to us, however in reality they are a positive and negative angel, each part representing parts of the light of the mind, which I don’t really understand. But not positive and negative as we might emotionally relate to them, as in a good and bad angel, or one that manifests the good and light, the other bad and the dark, but more like in as with an electrical current - just positive and negative. I think it has to do with the way the light moves within them, like in one it moves anticlockwise, the other clockwise, a yin and yang sort of thing, so together they form the perfect compliment for each other, and for working with us, each being needed to complete the whole.
As you are obviously very drawn to them Sam, might I suggest taking a moment and meeting your angelic pair. As you are now reading this, can you sense them with you, standing one on each side behind you? And can you feel and sense that they are and have always been there with you right through your whole life - right from your very first moment? And can you sense them with your daughter - her pair? And your son - his pair? And can you now sense them with everyone? And can you also sense that they exist in a separate realm to the mind spirits - say people when they die and who live in the mansion worlds? And can you feel or sense they exist in the same realm with the Celestials but are not Celestials and work with the Celestials helping them do whatever it is the Celestials do? And why I’m asking you to sense these things is so you can sense how they are different to us mortal souls, they are not like us, they are of a higher, finer, purer, truer, vibration of light - an angelic vibration? And can you sense how your angelic pair are themselves growing and evolving in their light, and how they will be growing as you grow, you all growing together but in different ways? And that it’s even conceivable that you’ll continue your ascension of truth all the way to Paradise with your angelic pair, so you might be on the threshold of a new incredible relationship with them; and how wonderful and fantastic to think that you might be destined to have a very close and personal relationship with them for a very long time. Does that give you goose bumps and bring tears to your eye? Can you feel them shining their love as light upon you, touching you deep to the core of your being? And do you feel like you want to rise up and join them, be with them, delight in the light and love of their angelic loveliness? They are certainly a wonder. And now, have a moment... and can you sense their power? Can you feel the power within them and behind them, as in, how they are at the forefront of their kind and that legions of them stretch away in the background all awaiting the signal to ACT?
So like how you met and spoke with your nature spirit friends, you might like to meet your angelic pair. When you are ready, if it’s not already happened, ask them to come round and stand in front of you, then and ask them to please introduce themselves to you. So you can get a feeling for and of them standing there - of which is the ‘woman’, which the ‘man’, which is positive, which negative. Ask them to please tell you their names and numbers - numbers being more important to them than actual names. Ask them to tell you what you asked me - how do they help and guide you? And ask them to show themselves to you, so you can get a picture of how they are wanting you to see and relate to them. And then ask each of them if they could please step forward and place their hand on your head so you feel their light move through you. And ask them to place their hand on your chest - heart, and on the back of your chest and stand with their hands on your shoulders. And finally ask them to place their hand in yours. And then, when you’ve done all that, then you’ll be able to easily connect with them, so speak with them any time you want, just as you can the nature spirits. And you can also hold a crystal or one of your wands perhaps and ask them to send their light through it into you, and then through you and out of it. And as you’re doing all of this, see what happens, what you feel, when you simply open out to them with your love and embrace them, throwing yourself open to the wonders of it all, casting aside any mental restrictions and imposed beliefs of limitation you might have to do with them - setting yourself free to soar with them in their glorious light to hear the heavens singing with the radiance of their voices. They are with you Sam for you to relate to in your own way - your way for you to delight in as you discover how it will be with them. So throw out, or rather, bring up, all preconceived ideas about them, any worries and fears as you express them and seek the truth of such feelings and thoughts, allowing yourself to be moved by your soul.
And of course, I’d love to hear of your experiences, and if anything they say to you contradicts what I’ve said or attributed to them.
Mary dropped a little hint when she said - ‘wonders’...
Have you asked your daughter what your angels look like?
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Post by James on Jul 17, 2014 19:00:48 GMT 10
Also Sam, I'd love to hear about your dreams with the angels, I've not actually read about anyone's dream experience with them that I have considered was being with genuine angels.
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Post by samantha9 on Jul 20, 2014 18:24:16 GMT 10
Hello James
This information has helped me so much to understand more, thank you. I have been connecting to my Angels and have felt their energy move around me and stronger on my right side, it has been a very moving experience and brought up a lot of emotion within me because of the overwhelming love I feel at the time, it has brought up so much grief for me to express. I am following your guidance about connecting with them every day and being aware of their presence all the time and sensing them around my daughter to which I feel will progress and get stronger with time like all relationships. My dreams have been beautiful as I have never really had Angelic dreams before to this extent and I love them, they feel so special. This is one of them:
I was in a farm yard just walking through it and there were three men working on farm machinery wearing blue overalls they were all bald and looked really tough and sweaty and were very big and muscley, I was walking through as they turned to look at me and I became very scared. The all put down their tools and walked towards me, the fear was running through me and I fell to the ground in weakness and fear, I submitted to the thought that they were going to attack me and I was screaming for help. They surrounded me and one of them smiled at me as he bent down and continued to tell me "Its ok Sam, its ok, calm yourself" he kept repeating this until I calmed myself and began breathing normally again and the terror had subsided. The other man said to me " you are ok Sam, Just look at the beams of light" I replied in confusion " Where? I cant see them, where am I looking, I don't understand" I was so confused and he said it again " Just look at the beams of light". Then I begun to see what he wanted me to see, I saw the three men begin to radiate the beautifullest beams of white light coming out of them, the feeling I felt was so incredible, I was crying and not able to stop, it was pure love coming out of them and surrounding me. The white light formed like a Halo around them until they were all light and this light took the form of wings behind them but not like wings as we would think, they were long and just made of pure light. I was unable to get up being in floods of tears like all the emotion within me was flooding out all in one moment, I couldn't feel any pain. The three men were now pure light as they rose up above me, I reached out to the and said "please don't go, please stay with me" they said "You are going to be fine Sam, we are always here with you". I can still feel the emotion within me at not wanting them to leave, not wanting the vision before me to disappear, I wanted them to stay. One of them told me " We are not who people think we are, we have reduced our light to appear to you. Become as light as light." I saw their light surround them like a torpedo, they were cocooned in their wings of light and shot of into the skies like bullets until all I could see were three Stars as I lay on the floor, they looked like they were stars moving, dancing for me in the heavens. I woke up to be filled with their love and I felt amazing James. As soon as I woke I wrote it all down and drew a picture of them so I never forget and it is all still just as fresh in my mind.
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Post by James on Jul 20, 2014 21:27:32 GMT 10
Gee Sam, what an incredible dream! The feeling it gives me makes me think it’s more like an astral experience, that you were over in spirit somewhere with them, so more than just a regular dream. I’d love to know what you thought and felt about it. Marion was saying if she was with you she’d like you to tell her all how each part made you feel and what you thought about it: why did you feel so scared with the men, why three men, how did you feel when you knew they were obviously not bad men, and more about the grief you’ve talked about. But only if she were closer to you, with you, and not over the Internet.
I am so grateful to you for writing it, I’m changing so much lately I can hardly keep with all my new thoughts and feelings about almost everything. Previously I would have wanted you to write about all your dreams, and I’d want you to ask the angels masses of questions for me, but now, that all being for my selfish self and not concerned for you and what you might be going through, I’ve changed, no longer needing to use the likes of yourself to further my own self-interests of trying to find out as much about spirit life and angels and whatever else I can. Now I’m feeling increasingly, this happening more with you and Desire as you share all your private feelings, thoughts and experiences, that it is all private and yours and so not for the likes of me to intrude on. That your dreams, for example, as with Desires experiences with herself and Sarah, are special, that all our experiences are so special, and should be completely respected as such. So I feel privileged and humbled that you both are willing to tell me so much about yourselves.
And gee, how they said they turned their light down to be with you, coming from the Celestial levels I guess, down into wherever they met you - possibly in one of the Earth planes? And such light, what a terrific feeling it gives you, goose bumps all over, and flying off so fast. And so much love for you... It makes me feel even more humbled - what would I know. I write my stuff about angels to you, but it’s so pathetic, so nothing compared to how they are, how it is over there in spirit. And yet having spoken about such feelings to Marion after I read what you wrote, I feel happier about just being my plodding along self, as there’s nothing I can do about it anyway. And I’m feeling better and better each day lately about leaving spirit to spirit, I’ll see it and understand it when I get there, and constantly wishing I was there hasn’t done anything for me. And so feeling better within myself and even more content to plod along jam-packed with all my fears even though all that wonderful light surrounds me. Me and my yuk, mired in dross and all the shit from my early life. Hating how I am, how I am just like mum and Gran, as I keep seeing. And yet that is how it’s to be as it is how I am, so keeping my nose to the grindstone, and yet feeling also better about it all.
I’m looking forward to seeing where it all takes you Sam, and I wonder what they meant by saying to you to just look at the beams of light. The best part for me from what you’ve said is that such experiences are not taking you away from your bad feelings, you’re not using them to just look at the light, and then with your mind block out the bad stuff. It’s all right for them to say look at the light and become as light as light, but they are not weighed down with yuk. Still, it’s something to aim for that’s for sure, and that for me is the goal of our healing, to become the true light that we are - the light of our truth. I wish I were as light as an angel feather.
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Post by James on Jul 21, 2014 14:15:20 GMT 10
Sam, I’ve had few more thoughts about your dream and angels. It’s interesting that they flew up into the sky becoming stars, as The Urantia Book often refers to some of the angels as Stars. As in, the Bright and Morning Star that is Gabriel, and the Brilliant Evening Stars that accompany the Avonals in their missions. Mostly from what I understand these are higher angels with seraphims being the ones who are our guardians and who move us into spirit when we die.
Also thinking about what they said to you and how they said it, being with you just to let you know you’ll be ok, has made me once again think that really they are not allowed to have that much personally to do with us, as we - humanity - are still officially in quarantine owing to the Rebellion and Default, with part of that quarantine denying us much personal involvement with Mind creations and other higher universal spirit personalities. So obviously, the same being with the nature spirits, they can come and make something of a personal connection with some people - and very few people, just enough so it would seem to keep our beliefs and semi awareness of them going. And that really it won’t be until the next Avonal age begins that they, like the Celestial spirits, will be able to connect more fully with us. And from all I’ve read over the years attributed to people having some sort of contact and interaction with angels, I’d say your experience is rather unique. Of course I don’t know all that goes on and for all I know there might be masses of people who have contact with them, but always when I’ve read and been told about such things I’ve seen it’s mind spirits and not angels they are involved with. And I was wondering if part of why you are having such involvement with them is because of your healing, because you are saying no to the Rebellion and Default within yourself, which is in turn opening up the way for them to come closer to you, so ending your personal quarantine.
Also the sheer intensity and beauty of what you portrayed in their being so perfectly those burley men to then turning into torpedo’s of light. It’s one thing to be told they can be anyone or anything they want, assuming whatever identity for whatever role, yet it’s another thing to actually witness it.
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Post by samantha9 on Jul 21, 2014 18:00:51 GMT 10
Thank you James for the information and your thoughts about my dream and Angels. I have never really thought to much about them but my dream has shown me, taught me, that Angels can come in many forms and I am being shown through my own experience, their nature so I would like to think this is a beginning of a new learning experience for me as I have never really given them much thought, it is all quite surprising to me as it is something that I never bothered about and thought it a bit airy fairy. I have been having several dreams and nudges and quite intensely over the last two weeks which has really grabbed my attention to investigate Angels in a more serious way, but to be honest it makes me feel a bit silly which is something I have had to look at, a bit ridiculous so I have areas of humiliation connected with it as I always thought it to be a bit silly with the New Age way of working with Angels, it never felt true or real and their worship of Angels felt wrong to me, to put Angels above My Mother and Father felt wrong and something I didn't want to do. But I understand them to be messengers and instruments of My Mother and Father and I am now beginning to learn more with your help and the Urantia Book. My Angelic dreams are very real when I wake up and I have even woke up with like a terrible feeling of Vertigo after a dream, having to hold onto the walls and feeling completely out of my body for about 3 hours after waking sometimes lasting a couple of days and not being able to work or drive, it feels like I have been of planet and not fully come back to body because there is a feeling with it that is depressed and grieving at waking up. That happened a lot but all connected to my dreams. I feel how wonderful it would be to be connecting with true Angels but also doubting it, I also need to experience and learn a lot more because I also have the awareness that Mind spirits could be working with me, how would I know? this is a hard one for me to know and maybe I have to go with my feelings and look at how I would feel if it was mind spirits and look into the "Let Down" issues that would bring, bringing to light the many times I have felt let down due to expectations. All so much to feel all the time, all perfect. This dream has brought many aspects of myself to light and how I feel unworthy to have a Angelic relationship and my resistance to believe it could happen. So I am expressing yet more aspects of unworthiness, humiliation, doubt, fear, denial the list goes on so I am seeing it as more help from my Mother and Father to make me feel these aspects of myself as I sleep, it is non stop day and night healing, but I do ask for it constantly to be shown to me and I am never denied.
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Post by James on Jul 21, 2014 19:49:15 GMT 10
Why do you feel unworthy of having a relationship with angels Sam? And I see from what you’ve written there is a lot to it for you, obviously with the angels being used to help bring up a lot more deeper stuff within you.
I don’t know where I got my love for angels from as it was not a part of my early life that I can remember, but I’ve always felt very drawn to them, with the New Age helping me open up to consider them being part of my life, yet all what is attributed to them and all the New Age stuff about how to work with them is silly if you ask me. I couldn’t bear it, so just did my own thing within it trying to sift out any grains of what I considered to be true and ignoring all the crap. It’s the same as what I have do when we go buying Marion’s crystal jewellery, having to discard all the New Age nonsense attributed to them. And unfortunately the same amount of nonsense is attributed to the nature spirits.
Personally I don’t think you have anything to worry about from the mind spirits. They’d not be attracted to what you are doing so far as longing to be with your Mother and Father and looking for the truth of yourself through your feelings. And were you ‘under their influence’ in any way, you’d not be able to write what you do on the forum, and I’d not like some of what you said, but so far everything you’ve said Sam has rung true with me, something I am so pleased and grateful for. So many people I’ve tried to speak with about what I consider to be true regarding the spiritual stuff, only having to stop because of all that I consider being rubbish. Even with ‘Divine Love’ people. The reality is I think very few people will actually be able to consistently do their healing, it requiring such personal dedication to oneself and so many bad feelings. And of course, should you have worries about mind spirits interfering or trying to deceive and lead you astray, these need to be fully acknowledged and their truth longed for.
And as for your vertigo upon ‘returning’ after your dreams that all fits in with you being out and conscious in your spirit body during such experiences. However all such bad feelings - and bad energy feelings, and of course any fears and worries of any kind, need to be fully embraced as you say you are intent on doing, so as your angel friends told you, you’re being looked after and will be guided.
And it’s good you giving me your feedback and writing how you feel because I don’t want to put any pressure on you. I just want to go along with you and if I can be of any help, then good. So if at any time you feel pressured by anything I say, please tell me.
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Post by samantha9 on Jul 22, 2014 7:19:43 GMT 10
Hello James, thank you for all you say. I never feel under any pressure from you, everything you say helps me to reveal more truth within me helping me to progress. My unworthiness comes from my feeling very unseen and unheard as a child, I wasn't worth the attention and didn't want to bother anyone or put anyone out in any way. I never felt worthy of any special treatment or being first in anything, for a lot of the time I just wanted to hide and not to be seen, the way I had been shown to be, so having a relationship so special has brought up more feelings of unworthiness for me to reveal the truth of. I am so glad that you have explained about mind spirits which all makes sense to me and now I can concentrate on finding more truth from any resistance I may have about having a relationship with Angels and more is coming up all the time, things just popping into my head for me to work on, more bad feelings which I am about to work on now as they come to me. I am amazed that my dreams are giving me so much to feel and work with about relationships, the Angelic dream has brought this up within me, it has made me look at the unworthiness I have felt in all of my relationships and I can actually feel myself being a child again when these feelings come up, going right back to where it all began in my childhood. I feel amazed that I have been sent such incredible help to show me the truth of all of my relationships and just how much feeling unworthy has affected every part of my life and stopped me from having true relationships. I am going to get on with my healing now so speak soon James, and thank you for all the help, I value it all as there is nothing more important to me than my healing.
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Post by samantha9 on Jul 30, 2014 6:40:42 GMT 10
Hello James
I had another Angel dream last night. I was laying in bed asking my Angels to draw close to me so that I could feel them and sense them and before I knew it I had drifted off. I was taken high up above the planet so I could see the planet from above as the Angels see it. I saw the whole of the Earth shown to me as an Architects drawing would be. All that we have built upon it was shown to me in Light but like a Blueprint. Like an Architect would draw it but in light, I saw the whole worlds architecture built in light. Then suddenly I was shot back down into my body and I jolted awake gasping for breath, such speed. The dream must have only been seconds but it felt like a long time, I woke up and couldn't believe what had happened. I felt so honoured to be shown this although I am not to sure why. I am working on a relationship with my Angels and feeling them stronger especially on my right side and around my head, I have been experiencing a strong rushing in feeling and great expansion around my heart which has brought me to overwhelming tears and unexplainable love, when I have this feeling I have trouble breathing, or rather, a change in breathing it goes very deep and shallow but it is a feeling I want more of. I will ask my Angels what they want me to know from the dream and see what feelings I get, I did feel very special, loved, valued and worthy to be shown the architecture of our planet, the blue print. All so incredible James, truly incredible.
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Post by James on Jul 30, 2014 21:20:05 GMT 10
It does sound incredible and I’d love to know what feelings it brings up in you. Particularly if any bad ones creep in as time goes buy. And I say this because as you’ve probably experienced for yourself Sam, a lot goes on on the deeper psychic levels with our dreams and such experiences as you’re having, all of which we’re not told anything about - can’t know about, but all of which have mostly very long term consequences, as well as the short term giving rise to any feelings we need to help us uncover the truth of where we are at.
I used to wonder why we might have such an experience as you’ve had, but with nothing informative accompanying it. Not being told why we are having it or what it means. But now I see that as much as I might like were I in your situation to have the angels with me as guides telling me all about what I am seeing and me being able to ask them questions, they would not do that with me because I am not true, so it is all rather confusing because I am confused, so it’s all given to me in keeping with the messed up state I’m in. A bit here and bit there.
However experiences I’ve had with spirits years ago now, which at the time I would ask and ask them to tell me what they were all about and why did I have them, I’m able to only recently look back on with some idea as to what they were all about, which is nothing like I would have thought back when I had them.
I do enjoy the whole mystery of the unfolding, and gradually I’m appreciating more the time it takes. The UB speaks a lot about the beauty of time, of all that one and the whole of Creation gains by time taken, which is the very opposite to how I was raised with mum having no time and always being in a rush - and certainly no time for me to take my time.
You didn’t say you felt nauseous after returning to wakefulness with the jolt this time, do you feel that’s an improvement on previous returns?
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